Comedy is tragedy plus time.
So goes the saying, and Matthieu Pavon is proving it true.
With Friday’s second round of the RBC Canadian Open receding into memory, the Frenchman has already found humor in the calamity that kicked off that day for him.
If you were keeping score at home, you probably recall that Pavon carded a 12 on the par-4 10th, his opening hole, a colossal blemish brought on by an unhappy medley of poor execution, bad luck and questionable decisions.
C’est le golf. C’est la vie.
In insouciant French fashion, Pavon took the octuple-bogey in stride. Or at least smoothly enough that he bounced back with birdie-birdie on his next two holes.
By then, of course, the damage was done. Pavon’s douze — that’s French for a dozen — plunged him 50 spots down the leaderboard, and he missed the cut by kilometers, finishing third-to-last.
He now had the weekend free. And what better way to kill time with some comic relief?
On his Instagram account, the 32-year-old put a cheeky spin on traditional golf instruction by offering what he billed as “The easy guide to making a perfect 12.”
According to Pavon, this is how you do it:
Step 1: “First shot: Feeling confident off the tee after a brilliant warm up. Pull the shot 40 [yards] left into deep rough.”
Step 2: “Get lucky: ball is plugged. Make a perfect drop — going for the green is tempting, although a little voice in your head says ‘get back to the fairway.’ Decided to go for it. Grass closed the clubface at impact — straight into the trees.”
Step 3: “Dead! Try to go back to the fairway but failed. Now deep in the thick rough.”
Step 4: “Feeling smart now, try to anticipate the clubface closing at impact. Wasn’t successful. Ball straight in the water!”
Step 5: “Drop.”
Step 6: “Great decision: Dropping 60 yards from the pin on a tight and wet surface. Fat the shot, ball in the water!”
Step 7: “Drop again.”
Step 8: “Head is gone. So why not try again from 60 yards instead of going a few steps back to your favorite 88 yard [shot]? Fat the shot again. Water.”
Step 9: “Drop again (starting to master it) from the same spot.”
Step 10: “Realize there are only two balls left in the bag. Play smart: aim left to avoid the big slope pulling balls back into the water.”
Step 11: “Finally on the green. God, it feels good! Looking back at the 10th tee and feeling like the clubhouse is not so far away. Nice lag to 1 foot to make sure I’m not making three putts (not great for the stats)!”
Step 12: “In! Highest personal score on a single hole in career. Walk to the next tee, try to pinch myself, ask my caddie if it was a 10? Turns out it was a 12! Think about John-Louis Guepy, the record-holder for most consecutive birdies (10). Why not? Birdied the next two… and came back to earth with a bogey on 13!”
And that’s how the pros make a 12.
