Why communication is the key to a good student-coach relationship

A few events have shaped me as a coach and mentor.  One that quickly became a cornerstone of my career was the realization of the importance of quality communication. 

I remember the lesson like it was yesterday.  I was bringing my best stuff. Coach-speak, videos, jargon by the truck-load, swing comparisons, and drills… I was vomiting information on the poor learner.  

And it wasn’t working out!

Thankfully serendipity (and some sanity) set in.  It occurred to me that communication is a two-way street.  No matter how intelligent my message was, it was only as good as what it was received and, more importantly, understood.

Ever since that fateful lesson I have strived to find every student’s communication currency.  Communicate in the correct currency and understanding follows with ownership and improvement being all but guaranteed. 

There have of-course been exceptions.  

There was this one lesson – I recall it vividly.  “Joe – I Know Everything About the Golf-swing” showed up for a lesson for the first time.  

For context, I always spend the first segment of the lesson learning about the learner.  Indeed the more I know about the individual the more equipped I am to help him or her to achieve the stated goals.  (Remember the thing about finding one’s currency?)  

Well, “Joe” used this time to educate me on every method and approach to the golf-swing known to human-kind.  The more I asked him about his strengths, weaknesses, tendencies, goals, inhibitions, fears. etc., the more he dove into his golf swing theory monologue.

Eventually, I capitulated and asked him to hit a few shots. He did and the results were disastrous.  To add fuel to the fire, he analyzed every shot he hit and proffered some explanation about how his body moved that was embarrassingly off base.

With my frustration levels were peaking, I violated every tenet of good communication.  I stopped him hitting balls and commanded that his assessments were illogical and incorrect. 

I asked him to make a slight adjustment and hit a shot.  He did, and the result was instantly better.  He tried again, and lo, the same good result.  This continued and eventually he was compelled to observe that the simple fix it could not be that easy.

My response, obviously, was that it could be that easy if he understood “Direct and Indirect Influences” on a golf shot. 

Simply put, your score is defined by your ability to get the ball into the hole and your only direct communication with the ball comes by way of your club-face. 

The ugly truth is, you can only “message” the clubface with your hands (and wrists and forearms).  No matter how well you shift your weight, or retain your spine angle, or rotate your body, the hands and wrists will always remain the tip of your spear. That makes them a “Direct Influence” on the quality of any golf shot.

Everything else, i.e., the movements of the shoulders, torso, hips, spine, legs and feet play supporting roles in this play billed Golf Shot.  Don’t misunderstand me, they are indeed important to the overall quality of the shot but they are not direct influences.  Every single one of those elements are “Indirect Influences”.

I hope my communication settles with you… If you have ever been told to “remove your hands from the swing” or “use only your big muscles”, remember your direct and indirect influencers and proceed logically.