A shot to the left would land in a toaster. A shot to the right would land on the oven. A shot long and right would hit the microwave.
If you can’t take the heat, stay out of the kitchen golf course.
“Golf courses may be closed…but the grind does NOT stop,” Sheard tweeted earlier this week under a video of his coronavirus-quarantine golf shot.
Indeed.
Sheard had landed his drive on the kitchen-island fairway. A shot to the green the size of a glass jar – literally – awaits. Sheard and a caddie approach the orange pingpong ball.
The junior on the golf team at Cedarville University in Ohio, looks over the shot. He picks away a few crumbs around the ball before lifting the lid of a jar, taking a pinch of sugar and tossing it into the air to gauge the wind. He has three clubs to choose from – a wooden spoon for loft, a spatula for distance and a green utensil maybe just for actual cooking.
“Spoon,” he says to his caddie as he puts an oven mitt on his left hand.
He takes a practice swing as the club is handed to him, then another with it. Sheard taps the spoon three times. He uncorks his swing.
In.
A loud scream comes from the background. Player and caddie high-five.
Perhaps the bathroom water hole awaits.