AUGUSTA, Ga. — Before we scene-set, before we try to encapsulate all that may or may not come in this Masters week like none other, before we do anything, let’s eat. Specifically, I want a Georgia peach ice cream sandwich. They were off the menu here last year, and the heart, along with the stomach, yearn. But let’s walk to get one together, OK? Cool.
[Walking …]
There’s Rory! He’s stepping out of caddie dining, to the right of the driving range.
There’s the gift shop! Ooh, no line!
There’s the bank of free-to-use phones! I’m forever engaged by these. You can’t bring cellies into Augusta National — but you can still call your loved ones to let them know you dropped a small fortune in the stop in the paragraph above.
There’s a patron with a digital camera! Almost another relic these days. But you can bring ’em in during the practice rounds. The woman tells me she finally won the ticket lottery this year. But she had to come alone — her husband got sick at the last minute — and wondered if I could snap a pic of her. Sure!
There’s the big oak tree! There’s the clubhouse! There are the green jackets! There’s the line for photos at Founders Circle! A Pinkerton security guard yells at me because I tried to cross a street too quickly. He did ask where I was from — Milwaukee, Wisconsin, I said — and he kinda smirked. I’m not sure what that means.
BUT THERE ARE NO ICE CREAM SANDWICHES! In the large concession area near the gift shop, the coolers were bare. I asked a worker. That’s all they had, he said, kindly, apologetically. Damn. I grab a pimento cheese sandwich, a bag of chips, and a soda — for $5.40 — and walk over to a spot near the first fairway.
So … maybe not much is different around here. In these uncertain times, in this Masters week like none other, ANGC will still smell like pines, and the Masters will still hand out a green coat come Sunday. But to whom?
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After all, on that same walk …
Ooh, here’s some drama!
There’s Tom Kim, PGA Tour wunderkind, who’s hitting irons on the range — right next to Brooks Koepka, LIV Golf’s latest winner. They went about their work.
Ooh, Abraham Ancer is wearing a shirt adorned with the logo from the Fireballs, his team with LIV. He’s standing in the press area to the right of the first fairway.
With that then, let’s scene-set. Snack time’s over. Here’s what we’ll be chewing on this week.
The LIV Golf question
Eighteen LIV Golf players, including six Masters winners, are here. They were allowed to play following an announcement by Augusta National chairman Fred Ridley — five days before last Christmas, no less — though that note also promised that “any modifications or changes to invitation criteria for future tournaments will be announced in April.” And now it’s April.
So could this be the last Masters with any LIV Golf player?
What if Phil Mickelson won another Masters?
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What if any LIVer won the Masters?
If one did, would the 17 others gather en masse and celebrate on the 18th green of Alister Mackenzie and Bobby Jones’ masterpiece — in front of the patrons, in front of the members, on CBS? Greg Norman, LIV’s CEO, is promising it.
Speaking of champions, what will go down at the Tuesday night Champions Dinner (and we’re not talking Scottie Scheffler’s cheeseburger sliders)? LIV’s six former winners (Sergio Garcia, Dustin Johnson, Phil Mickelson, Patrick Reed, Charl Schwartzel, Bubba Watson) will break bread with Tiger Woods and Fred Couples and a host of others, who, in short, believe LIV should, well, die.
Would a LIV win validate the Saudi-backed league?
Would a LIV poor showing sink it?
If Ridley does allow LIV to continue to play — and the PGA Tour continues its ban — are we going to see all of golf’s best potentially only at majors going forward?
Is that a good thing?
Does the fact that we’re asking these kinds of questions prove that sportswashing is working?
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The Tiger question
Woods, the 15-time major winner and five-time Masters champion, is playing. It’s his fifth tournament since his car crash in late February of 2021.
Can he win?
Can he contend?
If he doesn’t, where does that leave things?
What’s his shelf life? How many more Masters will he play?
Will he talk about the legal issues with his former girlfriend?
The golf ball question
The USGA is proposing to roll back the golf ball, though it will be left to tournaments to implement it. The majority of pros aren’t in favor. LIV may keep the old ball; David Feherty, now an analyst with the league, suggested as much on Sunday’s broadcast.
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What will the Masters do?
Can they keep lengthening holes?
The future of Augusta National question
Please take a few minutes and read this wonderfully reported piece by Golf Digest’s Joel Beall. It explores what could be coming at Augusta National.
Will there be a hotel on the grounds?
Will there be a second course on the grounds?
Would that second course host the Augusta National Women’s Amateur?
Would that second course be open to the public?
Will Ridley give any detail on it?
The actual golf questions!
There will be a tournament, too. Wild.
Is this finally Rory McIlroy’s year? When he’s been the defender for over a year of all that’s good and holy to him about the PGA Tour? When he’s been tinkering with his driver and putter?
Can Scottie Scheffler defend? Nothing he’s done over the past year should tell you no.
Will we get a surprise winner again? It’s been a while.
Could Harrison Crowe win? He’s the Asia-Pacific Amateur winner. And you must see this trick shot.
Could Matthew McLean win? He’s the U.S. Mid-Amateur champion. In real life, he’s an optometrist.
Could Larry Mize or Sandy Lyle win? Mize, the 1987 winner and an Augusta native, is playing his last Masters. Lyle, the winner a year after Mize, could be playing his final Masters too; a few weeks ago, he said he was done with PGA Tour Champions events.
How will 13 play? The tee box has been moved back 35 yards. Will it play more honest? Will it be less entertaining if players are laying up?
Will it rain? Shhh. But yeah, it doesn’t look good. There hasn’t been a Monday finish here since 1983. Hmm, 40 is a nice, round number.
One final fun thing
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Back to the walk.
Alayna Finau, Tony Finau’s wife, and their oldest son, Jraice, were walking out of the members gift shop, to the right of the first fairway. They were part of Netflix’s Full Swing; Tony and his family were prominently featured.
And now they’re stars, too.
I overheard this from some patrons:
“There’s Alayna! There’s Tony Finau’s wife!”
“There’s Jraice!”
Maybe surprisingly, he was walking without a bag out of the shop — it’s the only spot where you can buy merch with the Augusta National Golf Club logo; the patron gift shop has Masters items.
“He’s not the shopper I’d be.”
Indeed.
