Dustin Johnson’s best lines from hilarious Ryder Cup winning press conference

Dustin Johnson

Dustin Johnson was on the form of his life during the U.S. team's victorious press conference

PGA

HAVEN, Wis. — Ordinarily, Dustin Johnson‘s press conferences are, by design, pretty boring. A bit like Bill Belichick, he doesn’t really engage or offer much of a quotable answer. Wondering what we mean? Here’s a little flavor.

Or this beauty…

But on Sunday following his team’s record-setting victory at the 2021 Ryder Cup, DJ — loose from a few beverages and the sense of victory — put on the best performance of his career during the Americans’ joint appearance in front of reporters.

There was an overwhelming number of hilarious moments, but here are a few of my favorites…

1. DJ putting a microphone in Collin Morikawa’s shirt

Look on the left side of the picture below. At the very start of the press conference you’ll see DJ place a microphone in Collin’s shirt. Not sure why, but he did, and it set a hilarious tone for what was to come.

2. DJ promising to get a tattoo on his butt cheek

Yes, you read that right. After Thomas Bjorn did the same following Europe’s victory last year, Stricker was asked if he’d succumb to the prize, too. Stricker waffled, at which point DJ jumped in:

“Strick, I’ll do it if you do it,” he said. “I said it, y’all heard it. I’ll get whatever you want on my a– cheek.”

At which point Finau jumped in with some astute analysis of his own:

“DJ will probably have to ask Paulina first.”

3. DJ saying he could out-party the rest of the team

Midway through the press conference I asked Dustin Johnson if being the oldest player on this U.S. team meant he couldn’t hold his own partying with his younger counterparts. Could he out-party his teammates? We’ll let him tell you himself…

4. DJ maybe not realizing he went 5-0-0

There was a moment during the presser when DJ’s teammates called out his unbeaten 5-0-0 record and it seemed, at least from my seat in the house, like he was realizing it for the first time.

Here’s the exchange…

COLLIN MORIKAWA: That’s 5-0, ladies and gentlemen. 5-0.

TONY FINAU: 5-0 speaking.

COLLIN MORIKAWA: You’re joining I think maybe the fourth man in history.

DUSTIN JOHNSON: 5-0?

COLLIN MORIKAWA: Fourth man…

DUSTIN JOHNSON: That’s all right. I had good partners, though.

COLLIN MORIKAWA: No, no, DJ, that was unbelievable.

DUSTIN JOHNSON: Collin and Xander, very good partners. Thank you for making my record.

5. DJ taking his bromance to the next stage

But as DJ says, you can’t go 5-0 alone. He had teammates, and his partnership with Collin has been so successful it’s reached bromance levels.

“Yea, we got a bromance. It’s okay,” he said.

Asked if he and Morikawa would copy the famous bed-sharing video that Tommy Fleetwood and Francesco Molinari did after their victory in 2018, DJ said he was up for the challenge.

“If you want me to, absolutely,” he said, laughing. “I ain’t scared.”

6. DJ trying to leave the press conference early

This was a subtle moment, but a low-key hilarious one: At the last call for questions from the moderator, DJ stood up and started gesturing that it was time to go, before awkwardly sitting back down.

Luke Kerr-Dineen

Golf.com Contributor

Luke Kerr-Dineen is the Game Improvement Editor at GOLF Magazine and GOLF.com. In his role he oversees all the brand’s service journalism spanning instruction, equipment, health and fitness, across all of GOLF’s multimedia platforms.

An alumni of the International Junior Golf Academy and the University of South Carolina–Beaufort golf team, where he helped them to No. 1 in the national NAIA rankings, Luke moved to New York in 2012 to pursue his Masters degree in Journalism from Columbia University and in 2017 was named News Media Alliance’s “Rising Star.” His work has also appeared in USA Today, Golf Digest, Newsweek and The Daily Beast.